You ask how much I miss her?
Let me tell you all the ways
For sure more than my fair share
For certain more than it pays
I miss her by the buckets
By the dozen and in bulk
So much that I shoot rockets
My feelings, strong, as the hulk
I miss her in the morning
And the place she used to be
As Smeagol covets his ring
As the blind wish they could see
I miss her brains and beauty
Her gorgeous eyes and long hair
As a pirate loves booty
I treasure her in my lair
I miss her as my duty
As a soldier his lost legs
I loved her waist and booty
She was bacon to my eggs
I miss her religiously
As a bishop worships Christ
And through the night, secretly
Like all good thieves do their heist
I miss her each afternoon
as a Hale misses the earth
Like the son misses the moon
It's all true, for what is worth
I miss her during late nights
When I study at my desk
Whiles the dying of the lights
At the end of this burlesque
I miss her in deep sorrow
Sweet and sad is my tune now
Like there is no tomorrow
Forgetting, I don't know how
I miss her like she's gone far
& wish she came back to me
As if she'd stolen my car
So very much so, you see.
